it's is hard to find the relationship u want

I don't understand why there is a need for lots and lots of interaction for a relationship;constant smses and calling...and pull urself out of your other world. There got to be a limit to it!

I know my bf for 2 weeks and i already find it tiring to do tt. It's just tt i dunno why the way he think can be a bit like ..."immature". To him, by always keeping contact is essential...to me, keep contact about impt stuff is more impt than contact abt tweeny-little things.
He expects me to show how much i like him and he wants to be fast-pace. I don't think tt's right...it is like pouring 1 litre of water into 500ml cup. It is killing me slowly.

I think as an adult, it is impt to know tt relationship cannot be rushed. I keep telling him i need time...for many times but it just does not get it to him. And he keeps wanting confirmation...assurance. I am tired...i feel like someone trying to take care of a little bro.

I want to be an independent and better person...but i cannot stand a person who don't know how to think for himself and others.

He wants me to know how much he feels for me...but i don't see it. It is all words...words. Words are easily to create but hard to demostrate.

Anyway, it is not tt i don't like him but it is like he wants me to act like 2 weeks for relationship is almost like a marriage stage. Tt's crazy...

it is so hard to please bth parties in a relationship.

Sunday, April 20

I find that i kind of attracting one type of guys who like to be chicky...and think that i am those Xiao Mei Mei who is good to deceived.

I dun know is it because of my looks or the aura i release lead to this but I HATE SUCH GUYS.
Please don't think i am those girls who will be smitten(i think i spelt this wrongly) by such words for i know tt u are juz using it as a tatics to cheat girls. Arghh!! Go 2 hell

Anyway, today i am going to try to change myself! I realise i have forgotten about the promise i made to myself 3 mths ago on wanting to change myself.

From now on, i need to think carefully...with 3 months, i think tt is absolutely more than enough.

I have to start working soon~ =D

I hope i can get to see him soon...no matter what happen.